"Doesn’t David look like Benjamin Franklin?"
Carly, as I realize he actually does.
Carly, as I realize he actually does.
Carly in confusion after Dwayne explained he couldn’t hear her calling for food runners, because he wasn’t wearing his glasses.
Each shift at fridays I operate under one of three aliases;
Kristine-my actual name
Luna-my social media identity
Or
Bruce-the name Carly gave me when I forgot my nametag
So when I go up to a table and say the usual, “hi, my name is Kristine,” I usually get some smart remark like, “But ur nametag says Luna.”
To avoid this comment I sometimes don’t say any name at all in my greeting. To which I usually hear, “is ur name really bruce?”
Now I understand that to avoid all this torture I could just wear a nametag with my actual name…but I just wanna officially say:
It’s a fucking joke people…obviously my name isn’t bruce if I say it’s Kristine…and congratulations on learning to read, why don’t you use this new found skill to actually read the menu and understand what ur ordering…seriously…i don’t go around reading ppls nametags all day, why do you?
With that said, I think ppl are humored when I respond with, “I have many names” or “yea my name is bruce, so what?” and it’s all about making that extra dollar, right?
Carly
…and that’s the key to surviving at downtown chicago fridays…you have to realize how pathetic our guests lives must be for them to yell at us about things like kids menus or too much cheese on the broccoli.
The angry customer who accused Carly of being a rascist, because the restaurant ran out of kids menus.
“What do you want from me”
“Bruce”
“Why does Dave always get to leave early?”
After many a year in the service industry, I’ve learned to control my emotions and switch into robot mode any time a customer starts bothering me. However, every once in a while, there’s one that gets past the metal exterior and triggers my extreme irritation switch. Congratulations to the bitch wearing a fluffy, hot pink skirt too short for her size for making my list of ”If I ever see you again I will spit in your food.”
From the moment she snapped, “Where da bathroom at?” I knew it would be an interesting experience. When I greeted the table and was answering questions for her friends, she interrupts with a question about potato skins. I finished her friends’ questions first, as she barks, “Can you answer my question.” I replied by pointing out the difficulty of answering two questions at once.
When I returned to the bar Heather could tell something was up with the table. “Oh Heather, I think this could get interesting,” I sighed.
The problems continued…
I called Carly up after the drinking thing because I knew she would continue to drink it, which she did, despite saying that her boyfriend (who had his ID) would finish the drink.
I just gotta say:
For the next ten minutes I kept an eye on the table who kept whispering to the girl every time I would glance their way. Finally I went back to the table and said, “I’m sorry my manager’s right over there and she saw you take a drink. I have to take this away.” The instant response was, “we’ll were not paying for this!” Yea, I understand that you want free stuff and you confirmed that when you continued to say, “And I want half off my bill because I found a hair in my drink and my fries were cold.” To this I just laughed at her.
When it came time for desserts she decided she didn’t want either of the two options included in the three-course menu, but the brownie obsession instead. By this time I was so furious with her attitude, I decided to play the game back. Her brownie took 20 minutes, and may have had a substance added to her ice cream.
Rule #1 : Don’t fuck with people who handle your food!
By the time she got her dessert she started demanding her money back. That was the last straw.
“Listen,” I started to speak as I stared down at the ugly bitch, “I don’t know what makes you think that you can speak to me like this, but you’re crazy if you think I’m going to do anything else for you.”
“We’ll you’re the waitress, so why don’t you go get my money.”
“I’ll give you your money back, and then you can go.”
I got her money back, but she continued to talk the whole way out the door. Carly stood by me and continued to say, “You can go…just go!”
Finally she left. I think her friends were embarrassed because they tipped me once she left.
Yikes- Fridays is turning into a crime scene! I can think of four instances over the past two weeks involving some sort of “guest conflict” (to say it nicely).
Instance #1
Saturday, Feb 21
Another guest decided to not pay his bill. Seriously, why do people think this is ok? Bri alerted the security guard, ran in the back to grab a manager and was ready to call the cops. The security guard approached the guest asking him to pay his bill and immediately the guy got defensive. I didn’t see too much, because the restaurant was packed, but I heard a lot of shouting and I think I was two seconds away from a homicide scene.
This is also the same day that Kyle’s life was threatened for accidently bumping into a guest.
Instance #2
Saturday, Feb 28
Pretty much the same thing. The kid didn’t want to pay the bill and gave the security guard a hard time.
Instance #3
Tuesday, March 2
I stopped by on my day off to help Carly with the schedule. I’m in the office and Kyle walks in, “I got a guy trying to pay with a personal check because his debit card doesn’t have enough money.”
Carly leaves to help Kyle and returns two minutes later, “This guy just wrote out a check to the white house for $2.”
Deneen called the non-emergency police who showed up on bikes, then called a cop car and escorted the guest off the premise.
Instance #4
Wednesday, March 3
Didn’t see it, just heard about this one. Apparently a party of teenage girls sitting at table 90/91 were being so obnoxious they could be heard in the kitchen. A guest sitting at a bar table approached the girls and told them to stop acting so ghetto. This just escalated the situation to an entirely new level, which prompted other guests to leave out of irritation. The guest sitting at the bar table then began shuffling dollar bills at the girls which just took the situation to a whole new level. Rob didn’t even think about it twice as he literally pushed the girls out the door.
Wait, before you go, did I tell you about our stripes rewards membership?
The following story is inspired by actual events:
Carly couldn’t believe her ears, this sad excuse for a human didn’t have enough money to pay her bill and her only response was, “bitch.” How badly at that moment did Carly want to magically whip out a bat and hit the oh so obviously true bitch. She would settle for calling the cops, scanning a license and asking The Bitch to never return again.
“Here’s your money, bitch,” The Bitch said.
The words “thank you” hardly seemed appropriate but corporate policy deemed them necessary. Carly’s moment of contemplation allowed one last quip from The Bitch. ”I’ll be writing a letter, bitch.”
Carly didn’t mean to laugh, but couldn’t help it as she imagined how the letter would go-
“Dear Chilis, I’d like to complain about your restaurant in Downtown Chicago and how your manager gave me a hard time for not having enough money to pay my bill. What will you give me for free? - The Bitch”
“Well,” Carly sighed “Ok,” and she walked straight towards the security guard instructing him to oversee the departure of The Bitch. She didn’t worry about the letter because she was fairly certain The Bitch didn’t know how to actually read or write, hence not knowing what she was ordering and how much it cost. Maybe whoever she got to write the letter for her would help her realize the ridiculousness of the situation…probably not.
Two hours later…
Carly received a phone call from the G.M., Dave asking how the night went. Carly began with the story about The Bitch when Dave cut her off. ”Carly, did you have any walk outs?”
“No” she quickly replied.
“Good,” and he hung up.
Just then a server knocked on the office door, “Carly, my table wants a discount because they saw an ant.”
